Dumping

There are lots of ways to dump something on someone else.  “Here’s the laundry *whump* now fold it.”  “Honey, I just said ‘yes’ to so-and-so’s party.  We need to bring something, but I know you can figure that out.”  “I just agreed that our team can take on this goal and make it in half the time that they projected. …

Guilted Into Gratitude

For US residents we are quickly coming up on the Thanksgiving holiday where we are meant to take a time out and appreciate all we are thankful for.  Like all practices this can be a fantastic thing or it can be horrific, depending on how it’s implemented. …

Do Unto You

This season there will be lots of visiting and being visited and tons of people doing for and doing about and scurrying to make sure that everyone has what they need and things are taken care of.  The weird part is, in all this to doing the people to doing it will generally not include themselves in the equation. …

It’s Not Me It’s You

We’re responsible for our actions.  What we don’t often recognize is our reactions. Something happens and we don’t even know that it jerked off our path because the reaction is habitual and as persistent as air or gravity.  It’s just the way it is as far as we’re concerned.…

All The Distractions

To everything there is a season, right?  I have students and clients that come to me wanting to know why they aren’t making progress or why nothing is working.  They can tell me all the things which they are doing in their lives to make things better but things either don’t change or can even get worse. …

I Can’t Or I Won’t

SarlaccIt’s a really common human thing to hold ourselves back.  Our brains will rationalize it and make it seem logical and real, but in the end it’s all about fear.  On the one hand that’s a good thing.  We should keep ourselves out of danger and doing what is healthy and good for us, but being highly developed social beings that are rarely being attacked by wild animals or swallowed whole in a Sarlacc pit our fears range the gamut from real to imagined to “wow!…

Crisis Management

Being good in a crisis is a great life skill.  Thinking clearly, doing what needs to get done, being flexible in the moment and getting things back on course can mean the difference between life and death or survival vs. utter destruction. …

It Starts With Demo

There are so many examples in life of why it’s not a good idea to try to create something new in the remains of something old.  You don’t cook in a pot you haven’t cleaned first.  Um, yuck.  You don’t bring your new sweetheart into your home until you’ve removed all the evidence of the old sweetheart, not if you want to remain unscathed and have this new relationship work out. …

Veterans

Today in the United States we celebrate Veterans Day as a national holiday.  This has all the positives and draw backs of any other national holiday.  Most people have no real vested interest in it other than it’s a day off from work and it sucks the banks and post office are closed. …

Choosing No

I’m all about choosing yes.  At some point we have to decide that we’re going to do what we’re here to do, we’re going to reach out for the life we want, we’re going to be happy and we’re going to try to make that happen even if what we choose to do is wrong and we fail and succeed over and over again. …