You’ll  know something is healed when you no longer have a charge around it. When the trigger is gone, when you can be in the situation and it doesn’t cause you to implode or need to go through triage maneuvers to stop the bleeding, you will have successfully healed. It’s something that, like love, comes to our consciousness after it’s a fait accompli. We only notice it after it’s a done deal and we’re on the other side of things going, “Oh, this is what it feels like?  Huh. Ok, good.”  Usually we image that healed comes like a flash of lightning or and bright dividing line between here and there, but not so much any more than there’s a bright line that tells us when a bone has healed.  It’s gradual and we only truly notice after the healing is done.

It’s common, for some reason, to think that not having a charge about something is a mind over matter situation.  If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter, and so on.  Will power can do a great many things, but usually in such situations, it’s just putting a quick fix in place, like the boy putting his finger in the dam to hold back the water.  If he gets distracted for a moment, and who doesn’t on a regular basis throughout the day, the water starts pouring in again.  Mind over matter doesn’t heal deep wounds, it doesn’t even touch emotional issues, quite the opposite.  The mind ignores that the issues are emotional thereby compounding the problem. Using the mind to remove our emotional reaction to something just doesn’t work.  We can’t be reasoned out of how we feel.

What removes a charge around something is to become present with our feelings about it and about ourselves. There is a tremendous amount of truth that we work extraordinarily hard to avoid in our emotions. It’s truth that would prevent us from dealing with situations that aren’t good for us, that we have to “deal with” in order to get to a better thing, or that for a multitude of reasons we think we “should” be doing.  Our emotions rarely agree to these types of arrangements and try to tell us about the negative repercussions, which we so very much do not want to hear.  And so we develop a charge to behaviors, situations, and people not just because they aren’t what’s best or even good for us, but because they trigger our emotions to react and dose us with a huge amount of truth. And if we become conscious of and embody that truth then we’ll have to take action.  Validating our knowingness, our feelings, and our inner wisdom by acting on them diffuses the charge. It’s healing and in that healing we are no longer triggered.  It’s not that we forget, that we become compliant, numb or neutral. No, we become conscious, present and able to handle the situation without our own baggage.