Sins of omission. What gets left unsaid is just as telling as what is said. When we think of things left unsaid it’s either in a sad way, usually after someone has died or at the ending of a relationship we wish had gone a different way, or after an argument when all the witty and cutting things we should have said come to our mind. We tend to see the unsaid as a loss. It’s an opportunity to express which got wasted because it went unused, whether for connection or for scoring points or being right or winning back our self-esteem or whatever has been taken.
When we think if things intentionally left unsaid it’s usually connected to business or politics. You know, “The Man” that’s out to get us by not telling us the truth, big pharma, big agro, corporations (who are people), the 1% and politicians. We expect them to not tell us things. Some people spend their lives looking for where those things go unsaid, then put them in a form where they can get said. We actually have laws and constitutional amendments to protect people who unearth and speak the unsaid. What we don’t do often enough is look at the people in our lives to see what is being left unsaid. I’m not talking about the unintentional, the white lies that make society possible, or the quiet that allows us to maintain healthy privacy within a relationship. I’m referring to the intentional omission.
Like the conversation where so much is said but the problem it was meant to resolve remains untouched. It seems like it was addressed but if you track it back, all the concrete details, the places where promises needed to made and commitments formed are all blank. In all the words the doing was omitted. Or where there seems to be affection but the attention which demonstrates it is missing and the words that spill from the heart go left unsaid. We’re pattern makers. We have an amazing capacity to fill in the blanks, make up for the pieces that get left out, transform pieces that are neutral into Technicolor extravaganzas. We can go on this for years, wondering what is wrong with us, what we are not doing that is causing things to not feel right, to not be robust or fulfilling or making us happy. While we search within ourselves for the issue, it behooves us to also look at what is truly being said and what is being left unsaid. If we have been translating those, turning off the translator can be eye opening.