Confrontation Comfort Zone

It takes all kinds, as they say.  I marvel, though, at those who generate negative experiences in their lives.  I’m not talking about addiction or co-dependence, no I’m referring to a specific type of person.  They remind me of Pigpen from the Charlie Brown cartoons, but instead of existing in a cloud of dirt which they haplessly exude, they exist in the middle of a spiky sharp cloud of electric shocks that is constantly starting something. …Details

Glue Bottle Syndrome

We have certain categories of thieves, stereotypes if you will, that we like to put people in: Wall Street fraudster, poor/drug addict/street trash, and grifter.  We think of these people as “out there” in the world.  Other people have to deal with them, we don’t. …Details

Where Does the Responsibility Land?

There’s a difference between excuses and choices and it’s in where the responsibility lands. An excuse explains to someone why the person is acting or not acting the way they are and places the responsibility on someone or something else.  A choice explains to someone why they made a decision to act one way or another and acknowledges that there are other options that were available although it may or may not explain why those other options were not selected.…Details

Understanding Vs. Knowing

It’s common for my clients to want to understand what is going on with them.  They have a problem and they want a solution.  Often they understand the situation, they understand how they got to this place and they understand what they should be doing and what should work, but they can’t or it doesn’t. …Details

For Better Or For Worse

There are some common themes that I point out to people who are in a relationship (married/living together/long-term committed) that they sometimes over look.  One is that a relationship is a bit like walking.  If someone is really moving forward in their life, being challenged, growing, having personal issues, then the other isn’t. …Details

Step Into Yourself

I remember one particular evening.  I was deep into my studies with the elders of my people and studying with others who has niche knowledge in specific areas at which I was becoming adept.  Doing a lot of study and personal work stirs things up. …Details

Guilty Pleasure

The concept of a guilty pleasure is that it’s something we shouldn’t want, shouldn’t indulge in, yet we do. We should be better than this/that/the other but we’re not.  So we indulge in private or incognito separating out how we want to be seen from who we really are. …Details

Yes, I know but…

People think that being a contortionist requires a physical aptitude or quirk of nature, talent and a lot of practice.  Which is true if you’re wanting to be part of Cirque Du Soleil.  What most people don’t realize is that they are natural contortionists. …Details

Where Is The Enjoy?

It seems as if we’re really uncomfortable with the being of something.  I’ve been noticing this recently. If someone is enjoying something other people get uncomfortable and need to insert themselves, often in a negative way.  This is a common theme in the world of geekdom where people spend a great deal of time energy and money to enjoy themselves and the response from others is generally “Oh, you like that. …Details