The 1/3 Rule

A rule of thumb that comes in handy when resetting priorities is the 1/3 rule.  Our lives, in general, should be divided into these thirds: personal, family/friends, goals/path/profession.  The most common response to my talking about this rule is laughter because such a thing is obviously impossible for a great many reasons which they can…

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The Many Sides of Mother’s Day

Blessings to all the wonderful mothers out there who are doing the amazing job of mothering the people they love. We need more of you.  Ever considered being cloned?  No… well keep doing what you’re doing so others can learn from your example. My love and support and reverence for those who have survived mother’s…

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Your Truth is Not Your Truth

One of the things that abuse survivors have to deal with is warping of their fundamental sense of reality. For children who had abusive families, whatever form that took, one of the mainstays of that abuse is to be told that black is white and white is black.  They are told that what they see…

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Selective Priorities

It’s fun watching people take the time they have in any given day and the energy they have to expend in that given day and try to make it into something other than what it is.  You know, making coffee convert into sleep, trying to multitask what will take 3 hours into a 30 minute…

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Kick Up Your Heels

It’s the year of the Goat and one of the things this year is meant to remind us of is that we should be kicking up our heels.  You know how kids (kids-baby goats) see something and decide it needs to be climbed on, sat on, moved or played with in all kinds of ways? …

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And Then Again…

I listen to people…intelligent people…common sensical people…tell me all the details of who their partner is, what they think what they believe in technicolor detail. They tell me exactly what their beloveds won’t approve of, agree with, or support in any way, then tell me that’s exactly how they present things all the time.  Then…

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Killing the Messenger

I know it seems self-evident but it’s worth mentioning.  It is contradictory to sacrifice yourself for your path.  If there is no you then there is no path.  If the point is for you to achieve the goals you set for yourself, to live a happy and fulfilled life, and to bring your gifts into…

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Change Your Mind

One of the hardest things to do is change your mind.  Not about one particular thing or one particular opinion, but actually change it. Change how it functions.  Change how it perceives things, change the assumptions it uses, change the habits it’s built as shortcuts, change the hardwired foundational pieces which we lean on to…

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Blind Need

Nobody likes being used.  It leaves us with a sick feeling.  It’s like finding your car’s been broken into or someone got into your house.  Things that you valued have been taken, boundaries have been violated.  We feel unsafe and unsure of ourselves.  How could this have happened? But what if we’re the user?  We…

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Beltane

So it’s the first of May (There’s a great song about that by Jonathan Coulton that is NSFW but you can look it up on Youtube). For me, I’m reveling in the culmination of 5 years work to create a backyard oasis.  The pink rose that the developers managed not to destroy has become a…

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